I can't believe a great deal of things happened in just one week.
I did something stupid.
We almost ended things.
Got in a huge argument with my parents.
Was told to break up.
I ran away.
Weird thing is, none of that seemed to have happened.
Maybe I'm just ignorant. Or maybe it was too much of a stupid thing to do, that I don't even remember doing it.
Whichever it is, it was by far the most craziest decision I've made. I must admit, it was a foolish thing to do. Not only one person went through trouble for me, but a few.
The problem is, I run away from my mistakes. I give up easily. That's a thing I have to work on as long as I do get to live.
I was scared, confused. It all happened too quick and I needed time to think and forget about a few things. So I thought, maybe this IS the only solution. Running away. I thought, that way, my parents would realize what they've done and who they've done it too. Maybe after this they would stop, so no one else would go through the same thing my sister and I did. But then again, maybe this is just the beginning? Like a warm up for something bigger, level one on the trouble-o-meter.
It started out from a phone call that I made. Asked around for help and finally found someone who understands me. They picked me up, I packed my bags, left a letter and there I was. Free, out there on the road. I was shaking, nervous but thrilled about what would happen.
To be honest, I didn't really know where I would be sleeping. I didn't really think about it. I was selfish actually, only thinking about what makes me feel good. Before I ran away? I didn't even think about how people would react to this. Not even my boyfriend.
I kept it a secret, I didn't want anyone knowing and everyone helping me hide. They would end up having to lie about everything. So I thought, that was wrong. Maybe I should just let myself and the ones I was with know. That way, no one else would have to worry about covering for me.
Guess what? I was wrong. Another wrong decision.
I made everyone worried, especially him.
Finally, I found a safe place to stay in. But overnight people didn't give up looking for me. I felt guilty, not even telling the ones I am closest to. I kept thinking it was for the best, maybe just a few more days.
Everything was under control. No one knew where I was or who I was with. Well woops, wrong thought. Eventually, everyone found out. Now everyone was forced to tell the truth.
So there I was, sitting at a doughnut cafe with my boyfriend, confused about what to do next. Too much things was going through my mind.
Him
Me
My parents
My friends
My sister
My future
Urgh, my mind could just blow up any second.
But he made me think, maybe it is time to go home. Maybe a day is enough to prove my parents wrong. But we knew that after this, we would probably never see each other again. Sounds like a cheesy love story, yes I know. But you don't know how it feels like when you're in the moment.
It was so hard to hold my tears, I didn't want him to let go of me. It was the longest yet shortest taxi ride I've experienced.
Now look what happened, I love a twisted happy ending.
What I did? Regret it, but glad I did it.
Ps: Thankyou for everyone that has helped me gone through this, I love you guys and I can't thankyou enough. I'm sorry for everything.
No comments:
Post a Comment