Honestly, I don’t really know what I’m doing or what I’m asking for. I don’t know what’s going to happen in line for me, nor do I want to know. It’s strange actually, I’m always curious.
Exams are coming up in a week’s time. Wish me luck. I can’t wait to get out of this hellhole. One more year till I can finally start a new life, or at least that’s what I’d like to call it. I love drama, but right now it’s too much for me.
Have you seen movies, where the main character always has their favourite spot to think about things? Or to get away from reality and at least have a chance to fantasize about anything they have in mind? As bizarre as it is, no one would care. No one would tell you to stop daydreaming. You’re in your own little world, nothing matters. Cliché? I know. But it sucks that I can’t find a place like that.
I feel so pressured. Not by a particular someone, but a few. Especially by the two people that I’m supposed to look up to. It seems like everything I do is wrong, home doesn't really seem so sweet after all. I hate feeling this way, it makes it seem like I’m emo or some shit. I loved how things were going at the start of this year, I even thought this could turn out to be a kick ass year. But come to think of it, I’m wrong. I always am. But then again, things can change in a snap of a finger.
There’s always one question that comes up to my mind. Why does it seem like I have everything I ask for, but I’m still not happy? Maybe I’m not the only one, but I wish I wasn’t one of them.
Let’s be honest again shall we?
I smile because it fools people.
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